


my virtues uncounted

by delimeful



Series: October 2019 Prompts [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders is a Mess, Blood, Eventual Platonic LAMP - Freeform, Gen, Injury, Pre-Canon, Pre-Episode: Accepting Anxiety, Villain Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, the dark sides... are not lol, the light sides are tiny in the subconscious
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-02
Updated: 2020-09-08
Packaged: 2021-01-20 14:01:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21282893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/delimeful/pseuds/delimeful
Summary: The Light Sides find themselves stuck in the subconscious, where everything is huge, including the Dark Sides that reside there. Anxiety finding them at such a diminished size seemed like the worst possible outcome, but as they spend more time around him, they find themselves wondering if maybe he's got their best interests in mind after all.
Relationships: Creativity | Roman & Logic | Logan & Morality | Patton
Series: October 2019 Prompts [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1533644
Comments: 65
Kudos: 519





	1. Day 6: Pocket

“Shh! I think someone’s coming!” 

Logan and Roman ceased their bickering immediately, drawing back to where Patton was peering out of their hiding spot. 

Sure enough, there were huge steps in the distance, shaking the ground around them. As one, the three Light Sides pulled back to crowd together in the shadow of the gigantic couch arm they were next to. 

“Guess that answers the question of if the Dark Sides match the decor.” Roman grumbled quietly, shielding his friends with his body against the long shadow that stretched across the floor as a dim light flickered on, illuminating the worn-down living room. It was like something out of a horror movie, but the biggest concern was how big everything was. 

As soon as they had accidentally landed in the subconscious section of the mind, they’d known something was very wrong. They’d never been this deep before, for fear of running into the Others and causing unnecessary chaos in Thomas’s mind. 

It was clear that had been the right decision, seeing as the entire house around them was large enough to make them look doll-sized in comparison. The three of them were crouched under a small side table, hidden from most angles by the shredded couch next to it. Roman clenched his teeth, hand on the hilt of his sword as he watched the behemoth pass them by. If a Dark Side found them in this state… It was possible they’d never make it home. 

“Can you tell which one it is?” Logan asked quietly, and Roman dared to lean forwards a bit, only catching a silhouette moving quickly to the kitchen. 

“No, just that they’re dressed in black, and that doesn’t help! They’re _all_ goths!” He growled, and Patton clutched at his sash in warning. He took a deep breath, scanning for frills. “… I don’t think it’s my brother, at least.”

“That’s… that’s good.” Patton said firmly, a little pale at the thought of encountering Remus like this. Roman couldn’t say he didn’t agree. 

“Whoever it is, they’re in the kitchen now. We should move.” Roman proposed, and the other two nodded. They’d all tried sinking out, but everything was different, and they were well and stuck until they figured out how to manipulate the energy down here. 

If the subconscious mind palace worked the way their conscious one did, the stairs led up to the Dark Side’s rooms, and the rusty, dead-bolted front door would start them on the path back to Neutral territory. Remy would probably help them find their way from there. 

Mind made up, Roman began to lead the way across the floor, an ear dedicated to listening to the muffled rustling from the kitchen. They skirted the couch, sticking to the edges of furniture and walls. Walking out in the open when you were small enough to be stepped on by mistake was a bad idea for sure. He paused, looking between the door and the arched entryway to the kitchen. 

“Roman, how are we gonna get it open?” Patton asked, leaning forwards so the creative Side could hear his whisper. They all craned their necks up to look at the complicated array of locks. Even turning the door knob would be incredibly difficult to deal with at this scale, let alone all of… that. 

Logan found a solution first. “Perhaps a window instead?” 

Roman turned to look at the only window nearby, the one above the kitchen sink. In the kitchen. Where the Dark Side was making some sort of probably-nefarious meal. He took a deep breath, checking around the corner. The kitchen was dark as hell, the only nearly-nonexistent light coming from a flickering bulb on the far end. 

However, the giant Side was still shuffling objects around on the counter, back to them. This was as good a chance as they’d get, especially if the Side chose to eat on the couch after, which would trap them for ages. He gestured for them to wait, and then sprinted across the tiles of the entryway, skidding quietly to the small space between the bottom of the cabinets and the floor. As soon as he was settled, he twisted to check on the Dark Side. 

No movement. In fact, they seemed almost too still for a second, and Roman held his breath until he saw them start to move again. Whoever it was must’ve spaced. He kept an eye on them as he gestured the other two over. The Dark Side didn’t still again, busy with what looked like possibly toast. Evil toast, no doubt.

“Gonna try to find a way to get you guys up.” He said, and reached up for the edge of the cabinet door.

For once, the worn materials worked in their favor, since the wood was chipped and splintered enough that he felt confident enough to haul himself up and begin to climb. 

“Be careful!” Patton whispered, and he turned his head to shoot them a dazzling grin before continuing up. 

Before long, his muscles began to cramp, but he wasn’t a prince for nothing, and he pushed through the strain to finally haul himself over the edge of the counter. No time to catch his breath, he rolled back to his feet to scurry over to the nearest object he could hide behind, a cookie jar that seemed to have something crusty spilling over the top, gluing the lid to it. 

He needed something to work as a rope… He scanned the counter thoroughly, his gaze eventually coming to rest on an open container of dental floss. What in the hell was that doing in the kitchen? Was one of the Dark Sides obsessed with dental hygiene or something? Not his brother, that was for sure. 

Whatever, gift horses and all that. He cast another glance at the figure, now able to see the hood on him. He was gaining a fair idea of who it was, and he definitely didn’t want to draw his attention. He moved silently across the countertop to grab the dental floss before retreating to his former spot. 

He wedged the small white container between the jar and the wall, wrapping the floss around it a few times for good measure, and then ran forward to the counter’s edge to toss it over. 

Luckily, he had gotten it pretty close to where they’d been waiting, and he watched nervously as Logan tugged on the string and then tied the end of it into a sort of swing loop they could sit on while Roman hauled them up. The logical Side sent Patton up first, and Roman began to slowly pull the thread back up, gaze darting between his task and the giant in the room with him. He willed his hands not to grow slick.

Miraculously, Patton got up without a hitch, and then moved behind him to grab a length of the floss as Logan stepped onto the loop. They began to tug, mentally counting in sync with each pull, and for a moment it seemed like they’d pull it off. 

Of course, that was when the giant turned around, a knife of all things in hand.

Any other time, Roman would have relished in the look of shock that blossomed on Anxiety’s face, a rare moment of unguarded emotion, but now he just felt his stomach drop. Just as quick, the other Side _moved_, blindingly fast. There was a clatter as the knife fell to the floor.

“Oh sh- !” The voice rumbled around them as Anxiety was suddenly _there_, his hands clapped around Logan as though he was an errant firefly. Roman felt terror chill him at how Logan was completely obscured by those huge hands.

“Let him go!” He cried furiously, voice much too small for the wrath within him. He drew his sword, and Anxiety looked up at him with a surprised glare. 

“What were you thinking?” He thundered, and behind him, Patton clapped his hands over his ears. Anxiety paused for a moment, something in his expression shifting, and then continued quieter. “Are you a moron? That floss could have snapped, that fall would have killed him!” 

Roman faltered at the thought, and Logan’s muffled voice said something they couldn’t make out. Anxiety looked down as though he’d forgotten who was in his hands, and Roman bristled viciously, visions of the Dark Side crushing or dropping his friend dancing before his eyes. “Let. Him. Go!” 

Anxiety glanced at them with an irritated glare before setting his hands on the counter and opening them to dump Logan on his ass roughly. His face worked itself into a scowl. “What are you three doing here?” 

Roman jutted his chin out, prepared to shoot back a scathing insult, but Logan answered first. 

“We aren’t certain. Some sort of transport was triggered while we were traversing the Neutral area, and we ended up here as a result.” He explained, adjusting his glasses and disheveled appearance as he moved to stand back up. Roman deflated slightly.

“It was an accident!” Patton added, expression worried. “We’re trying to leave right now, promise!” 

“Patton!” Roman shushed him too late, sword still in hand. 

Anxiety looked at them unreadably for a moment, and then sighed. “Yeah, okay, whatever. Just get out of my hair and don’t come back. You might not be as lucky next time.” 

The last part was muttered under his breath, but Roman still heard and growled at the blatant threat. Anxiety ignored him, turning back to his toast, and Patton tugged at his arm, pulling him towards the window.

A second later, there were loud footsteps and muted voices. Not from in the house. From out of it. 

They all exchanged alarmed looks, frozen in indecision for a second. Roman was the only one to notice the movement in the corner of his eye, and he twisted in time to see Anxiety’s hand bearing down on him. He yelped and lashed out with his sword, but the bigger Side barely flinched before closing his hand around him and lifting him straight off the counter with ease, sword and all. 

Over the pounding of his heart, he could hear the others frightened voices, and he writhed angrily against his fleshy prison, only to travel through the air at such a speed it made his head spin. He could feel something warm and liquid soaking in his clothes, and grimaced at the scent of blood despite being the one who caused it. 

In the next moment, everything was darker than before, and the hand loosened. He fought out of it, landing on a soft surface that dipped under his weight, and almost immediately something warm dropped on top of him. He almost reflex-punched whatever was on him, having lost his sword somewhere in the process, but a moment later recognized Patton’s yelp as he accidentally elbowed the other in the stomach. “Patton?” 

“Roman!” The heart threw his arms around him, and Roman struggled to get them to something resembling upright. Everything was moving around them, and he recognized the fabric around them after a moment. 

“He put us in a pocket!” He declared, hideously offended. “How dare he- oof!” 

“Ow.” Logan said in a monotone as he, too, was unceremoniously dropped on top of them. They all struggled to readjust for a second, and then the hands were back, this time pressing them up against the back of the hoodie pocket, against Anxiety’s torso. What was the point of putting them in his pocket if he was just going to squish them?!

Roman almost opened his mouth to yell with the little air left in his lungs, but the sound of the front door slamming open made all three of them stiffen and still. 

There were voices, indistinct through the layers of fabric and flesh, but one of them Roman would know anywhere. His breathing sped up, and Patton gripped his hand tightly, doing the same to Logan on the other side of him. The hands around them loosened slightly, but none of them moved as Anxiety’s voice rumbled out an answer above them, vibrating through them.

“No, I found a hair in the jam. Maybe if you guys actually cleaned once in a while I’d be able to cook.” He said, tone biting, and then paused to listen to whatever the others were saying. Anxiety shrugged with a motion that thoroughly jostled them. “Whatever, I wasn’t that hungry. I’ve got work to do.” 

With that, the Dark Side turned on his heel and sulked out of the room, going by the dizzying movement that made the fabric around them shift and stretch. They were even more dizzy by the time Anxiety got up the stairs, his chilled hands keeping them more or less secure on the way up. 

Roman realized where they were heading as the Dark Side stepped into his room, and the three of them traded helpless glances as the door clicked shut behind them with a sort of ominous finality, all thinking the same thing. 

How were they going to get out of this one?


	2. Day 12: Giant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil has to deal with the stress of looking after his three new guests- y'know, the ones who hate him?

Virgil sank into his chair, hands still pressed against the tiny forms in his pocket. 

That had been too close. He shuddered to imagine what the others would do if they’d been the ones to find the three Light Sides in such a state, especially if they’d found out Virgil was so clearly sheltering them. 

Still, now he had to actually deal with the repercussions of his actions. Ugh, he hated that. For a moment he toyed with the idea of not talking to the others at all, just putting them in a well-furnished, idiot-proofed box until he could find an opportune time to sneak them out of the Subconscious. 

He shook his head, dismissing the idea. It’d be much easier on him, sure, but he could already feel the fear that the three were emitting currently. He could imagine how much worse it would get if he started treating them like pets, however unintentional. 

He knew he’d certainly freak out in such a situation. He’d barely ever gotten to talk to them except for when they were fighting. They didn’t know him, and generally Dark Sides weren’t too keen on their presence, so he knew that they’d assume the same about him even though he’d just saved them from a world of terror. 

Virgil took a deep breath, feeling one of them- likely Roman- shoving aggressively against his fingers. Time to face the music. 

Checking to make sure his desk was mostly cleared, he tried to gather them into his hands and found that the three of them were linked together, clinging desperately against his gentle tugging. He sighed, standing up so that his pocket was a little above the desk and then scooping the three of them out one side of it. 

They landed in a heap, and Virgil sat down again, waiting for them to gain their bearings. Roman rolled to his feet immediately, standing in front of the other two defensively, and Virgil felt a surge of panic at the blood staining his white outfit. He reached out to cup the creative Side in a hand, eyes searching. “It’s been like five minutes, where are you bleeding from? Jeez, Princey, did you impale yourself on your own sword?”

Roman batted Virgil’s fingers away, eyebrows raised in indignation. “This isn’t my blood! It’s yours, you kidnapping fiend!” 

Virgil paused, checking his other hand. “Ah.” So it was. Roman stared at him strangely.

He pressed the cuff of his hoodie against it, shrugging. “As long as nobody’s bleeding out on me.” 

“Why would you care?” Roman sneered, eyes narrowed in distrust. Virgil rolled his eyes, leaning back against his chair. 

“Oh, I dunno, maybe because my job is to keep Thomas safe, and core parts of him getting injured doesn’t exactly line up with that? Why’d you _think_ I hid you from the others?” 

The three of them exchanged surprised looks, and Virgil ignored the slight sting he felt at the action. Patton was the first to step forwards, ignoring Roman’s warning glance. 

“Well, in that case, thanks for the help, Kiddo!” He said, giving Virgil a warm smile. He averted his gaze and ducked his head slightly, unsure how to respond to the seemingly genuine praise. 

“Yeah, whatever.” He eventually muttered, and Patton beamed. Logan stepped up as well, apparently finished fixing his disheveled appearance. 

“While we appreciate the assistance, Anxiety, we do still need to return to the Conscious part of the Mindscape. If you could point us in the right direction, it would be useful.” He asked, adjusting his tie. 

Virgil was already shaking his head, ignoring Roman’s scowl. “No way. You guys won’t get far, not like that. Everything’s giant, it’s way too dangerous.”

“That’s why I am here!” Roman cut in, his chest puffed out arrogantly. “No harm will befall us so long as I am defending.” 

Unable to resist, Virgil leaned forwards and flicked Roman lightly in the side, causing him to almost topple over. “Right. Because your toothpick did so much to keep me from grabbing you.” 

Roman growled. 

“Then what do you suggest we do?” Logan asked, voice still carefully neutral. Virgil closed his mouth, a little taken aback at the question. He hadn’t expected to be asked for advice, though he supposed that at this size Logan understood that they had no choice but to clear a plan with him first. 

“You can’t sink out?” He asked, and received a couple of headshakes. “In that case… If you give me access to the conscious mind, I should be able to rise up there with you guys in tow.” 

Patton’s smile faltered slightly, looking at Logan with worry, and Roman took the opportunity to jump forward again. “Aha! I knew you had ulterior motives, you villain! You won’t be gaining any more influence over Thomas through us!” 

Virgil blinked. “What?”

“We’re not really supposed to do that, Anxiety. Dark Sides aren’t allowed to be up there.” Patton said, vaguely apologetic. 

“Yeah, I know that much.” Virgil responded, still confused. “Just turn it off after you’re back up there?” 

“Once Thomas is consciously made aware of the presence of a Side, there’s no ‘turning off’ what knowledge.” Logan explained, pushing his glasses up. “You would have access permanently. That said, if you agree to limit your influence on Thomas and return here after aiding us, it might be possible to work something out.” 

“No, no no no.” Virgil shook his head sharply. “I can’t do that. Do you have any idea how the others would react if they found out I got permanent access to the Conscious in the process of helping you guys behind their backs? It has to be reversible. What if I just didn’t appear to Thomas?” 

“I don’t think that would work, Kiddo…” Patton admitted, and Logan nodded. 

“Perhaps a suitable alternative would be you bringing us to neutral territory yourself?” He suggested. 

“Too risky.” Virgil shot the idea down, already seeing all the ways it could go wrong. “If they find me, it won’t be pretty, and if I get discorporated, you three will be stuck with them alone at that size. Not happening.” He said firmly. 

“Well, then what do you suggest we do?” Roman grit out, lip curled. “Since, you clearly don’t like any of our ideas.”

Virgil shrugged. “You’ll just have to stay here until we find an opening. Sucks, but unless you come up with something better, that’s how it’s gotta be.”

“So you reveal your true colors, then.” Roman accused, eyebrows furrowed. “You can’t keep us stuck here in this giant prison for your own entertainment. We’ll simply escape!”

“Roman!” Patton said, frowning at him. Virgil only shrugged, figuring it would come to this.

“You can try whatever you want, but this room doesn’t have any windows, and I know you can’t open the door, so… It looks like I totally can keep you here, and I will. Better get used to it.” 


	3. Chapter 3

Patton wandered over to the edge of the desk, away from where Roman and Logan were discussing approximately where they were in the Mindscape and how they could escape Anxiety’s room.**  
**

Anxiety himself had retreated to sit on the corner of his bed, leaving them on the desk. He looked awfully casual, but Patton could see the way he glanced over out of the corner of his eye every couple seconds. 

He sat on the edge of the desk, remembering how the other Side had fretted over Roman’s imaginary injury. He squinted at Anxiety. Had he treated the cut on his hand yet? Patton hadn’t seen him do anything of the sort, and his left hand was conspicuously tucked away into his pocket.

Well, if they were going to be staying there a while, it would be best to get to know their host better, wouldn’t it? 

Mind made up, Patton popped back up to his feet, and jogged over to the edge of a shelf. Carefully, he began to sidle along it, carefully not looking down as he got closer and closer to the bed. 

Just when he was almost over it- 

“Patton! What are you doing?” Roman yelled, and Patton jumped slightly, tilting forwards a bit. 

“Uhhhh,” Patton replied as he pinwheeled his arms, trying and failing to keep his balance. “Woah!”

Only a blink after he toppled over, however, there was a dark presence at his side, a hand providing a soft landing point only inches below the shelf. 

“Oof,” he grunted, and then a gust of warm air rustled his hair from above. He craned his head back to look at Anxiety, who was sighing lowly in relief. 

“Unhand him, villain!” Roman cried from out of sight, and Patton felt the hand underneath him twitch slightly with tension before going lax again. He frowned, getting to his feet to stand and look over at his friend.

“Roman, don’t be rude!” he chided, struggling to stay upright on the surprisingly soft hand. He ended up sitting back down heavily, and craned his neck to look at the Dark Side. “Thank you, Anxiety.” 

He was treated to the sight of Anxiety’s eyes growing wide in a rare moment of unguarded surprise, and smiled happily. If he’d known that the Side wasn’t really that scary, he would have come to visit ages ago!

Maybe not while so small, though. It seemed to be stressing Anxiety out.

“Wha- Patton! It’s not rude when he’s holding you captive!” Roman said, anger obvious in his voice. “Let him go!” 

“Anxiety seems to have caught Patton to keep him from falling,” Logan chimed in, stepping a bit closer as though trying to peer up at where he was being held. “I don’t think Patton has been in his hand long enough to qualify as being ‘captive’, Roman.”

“Yeah, listen to Logic for once, Roman.” Anxiety’s voice rumbled through Patton, the larger Side rolling his eyes and placing his hand down on the desk. Patton grinned and waved at the other two, not moving from his spot settled firmly in the dip of Anxiety’s palm. 

“Logan, c’mere! Check this out, it’s so cool!” 

Logan took a moment to look unblinkingly at Anxiety, analyzing him in a way that surely would have made him bristle defensively if he wasn’t already busy staring at Patton with befuddlement. Roman’s head was whipping back and forth between all three of them, as though waiting for someone to return to their senses.

“Very well.” Logan began to walk up to where Anxiety’s hand was resting, and Roman followed along with a slack-jawed expression, less intentionally and more because of some half-formed sputtering about not wanting to leave both the other Light Sides closer to Anxiety than him. 

Anxiety’s hand twitched slightly under him as Logan got closer, and Patton crossed his legs to better balance. He wondered how it felt to have a whole person in one hand. Probably a little scary, going by the slight tremors Anxiety was trying to stifle.

“Interesting,” Logan said from where he’d reached out to touch Anxiety’s wrist. With his other hand, he held two fingers to his neck. “Your heart rate appears to be much higher than mine despite you not having recently endured significant exercise. Is this normal for you?” 

“Duh. I’m the embodiment of fear,” Anxiety grumped, tilting his hand surprisingly gently so that Patton slid off onto the desk. He clicked his tongue, shaking his hand a bit to dislodge Logan’s grip. “Now stop that. I’m not a science experiment.” 

“Awww,” Patton pouted at the loss of his seat as Logan looked up at Anxiety with a confused tilt to his eyebrows. 

“Of course not. I was simply making an observation out of a desire to learn more about you.” 

Anxiety’s face pinched inwards as though he’d bitten into a lemon of suspicion. “Well, checking my pulse isn’t going to help you figure out my weaknesses, so how about you keep your hands to yourself.” 

This got a bark of not-laughter from Roman. “That’s rich coming from you, _Grab_-ston!” 

“Grabston?” Patton frowned in consternation as he attempted to figure out the wordplay on that one, and Anxiety’s scowl deepened. 

“Oh, you’d prefer I just watch you fall to your death next time? ‘Cuz rest assured, from that height, you’re _guaranteed_ to splatter,” Anxiety grit out as he loomed over them, hand fisted at his sides.

“Is that a threat?!”

“Weaknesses? Learning more about others is my role,” Logan said, though seeing as the other two had escalated to near-shouting, it was spoken more to himself.

“Oh!” Patton clapped his hands together once. “Like Gaston! I get it.” 

“No, it’s not a threat, are you an _idiot-_!” Anxiety turned away sharply in dismissal, making Roman’s hands twitch for a sword that wasn’t there, and Patton’s eyes caught on a drop of something dark falling from one clenched hand.

“Anxiety! You’re bleeding,” he called out, his voice cutting through the lingering tension.

Anxiety looked down at his injured hand like he’d never seen it before. “… Yes?” 

“Aren’t you going to heal it?” Logan asked, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “There doesn’t seem to be much sense in keeping an injury around.” 

Patton nodded in agreement, but Anxiety seemed to be further confused by his words. “Heal it? What, like a superpower? It’s just a cut, not much to do for it but slap a bandage on.” 

The three Light Sides exchanged questioning glances, and Roman ran a hand through his hair with a groan. “Most Dark Sides can’t heal injuries instantly like us. They don’t have the power to alter the mindscape like that. Except my… brother.” 

Anxiety recoiled slightly. “You mean you guys go around pulling your ears off and shit for fun, too?”

Patton paled slightly at the thought, and Roman growled low in his throat. “No! We’re just more connected to Thomas, so it’s obvious that we’d be more powerful. We don’t go using it all willy nilly like him.” 

“Huh.” Anxiety shoved his hands back in his pockets, much to Patton’s dismay. “Perks of being a core Side, I guess.” 

“Hey!” Patton cried, making Anxiety’s eyes snap to him eerily quick. “Come back over here! You shouldn’t ignore injuries like that, mister! I’ll heal it for you.” 

“Patton, he’s _literally_ imprisoning us here,” Roman groused halfheartedly. He knew Patton well enough to know that the father figure would not be deterred. 

Anxiety, on the other hand, was a bit more reluctant to concede. Patton had to coax him over like a startled deer, and only Roman’s snort finally propelled him to set his hand on the desk again, grimacing. 

Patton set a gentle hand on Anxiety’s thumb and focused on fixing the cut so that it would match the soft palm he had been sitting on earlier. 

Nothing happened. 

Patton frowned and focused harder, but the tug of change that he normally felt in his chest seemed somehow… muted. “Something’s wrong…” 

Logan, who had been watching closely, made an attempt of his own, likely more out of curiosity than actual concern for Anxiety’s injury. He swiped a hand over the cut, a gesture that would normally seal the injury easily, but all he got for his trouble was a hand soaked in blood and a pained twitch from Anxiety. 

“Very helpful,” The Dark Side commented dryly. Logan shook his hand with mild disgust on his face, like a cat that had stepped in snow.

Patton frowned harder, reaching for that connection inside of him, seeing if maybe something Thomas was doing was hindering them. 

“Uh, guys?” This result was considerably more alarming. “Can you feel Thomas?”

Roman and Logan broke off from muttered bickering about whether or not Roman should try healing Anxiety to stare at him, and he could see the change that came over them when they tried for themselves. Anxiety picked up on the changed mood immediately.

“What’s going on?” he asked, looking between them with a crumpled brow. 

“Why don’t you tell us?” Roman’s anger came with a distinctly panicked edge. “Why can’t we influence Thomas? Whatever you did, _un_do it!” 

Looking at Anxiety’s startled expression, however, Patton got the feeling that the situation wouldn’t be resolved so easily.


	4. Chapter 4

In the time it took for everyone else to get worked into a panic, Logan had come up with a few theories on why, exactly, their connection with Thomas would be so suddenly muted.

Of course, many of those theories were only useful if they could be proven, and seeing as they had a limited amount of time and space to work with, he could set them aside to figure out the direct, exact cause another time.

For now, the priority was finding their way back home. Once they were able to reconnect with their part of the mindscape, their connection with Thomas would also hopefully repair itself.

“Think of our current status as dealing with some temporary interference,” he told the others. “Once we leave the subconscious, our metaphorical signals should reach Thomas again.”

“‘Should?’” Anxiety asked, looking dubious.

“And how are we to leave when this shadowy scourge is thwarting our every escape attempt?” Roman added, glaring balefully up at Anxiety.

“Hey, you technically haven’t made any escapes yet, so_ I _technically haven’t thwarted anything yet.” Anxiety ignored Roman’s exasperated expression with ease, shrugging. “Schrodinger’s Thwarting.”

“Anxiety, kiddo,” Patton stepped a little closer, pulling them all back on track, “I don’t think we should stay down here for too much longer. It’s not good for us to be disconnected from our rooms like this.”

“And that’s not even mentioning the fact that we don’t know how Thomas is functioning without his core sides connected to him,” Logan added, hoping that the other Side was in a reasonable mood.

Anxiety kept his face neutral, but Logan could see the little crease between his eyebrows and the way he went slightly paler. “It’s still too dangerous to risk without a plan.”

“And with a plan?” Logan pressed.

Anxiety’s shoulders bunched up even further, and for a moment he was worried he’d gone too far, but then the other Side let out an irritated sigh.

“If it’s actually that concerning, and I can more than imagine how it could be, then. I guess. We could try. _With_ a plan,” he emphasized as Patton perked up excitedly. “One that I agree to.”

“That’ll only take us a lifetime,” Roman grumbled, but even he seemed revitalized now that they were getting somewhere.

Logan found himself getting excited as well. “In that case, I need all the information you have on routes to neutral territory and the weather cycles here.”

Anxiety materialized the data into files on a touchscreen phone, which would work quite efficiently as a display considering their size. “Good luck figuring anything out. This end of the mindscape is way more… chaotic. Stuff’s always changing.”

“I don’t mind a challenge,” Logan reassured him, and then set to work making spreadsheets and comparing trends. It was almost soothing.

In the background, he could hear Patton asking about who they were most likely to encounter if they attempted to beeline for the neutral zone, and Roman bartering for possession of his sword back. (The trade seemed to be settling on Anxiety handing over the sword in exchange for no stabbing and no nicknames for a week. Roman was perhaps more reluctant to stop generating witty quips than necessary.)

As Logan suspected, when Anxiety didn’t feel implicitly threatened by them, he was much more open. Though, that might have also been the exposure to Patton’s determined friendliness, which Anxiety seemed to eye with the wariness of a stray cat. He’d have to bring this up the next time they had a debate about the effectiveness of so many of Thomas’s Sides being hidden away.

Now wasn't the time for that, however. Now was the time for action, as Roman liked to proclaim.

“I’ve found the best path for us to take,” he announced, drawing all eyes to him.

Probably no time for an illustrative powerpoint to demonstrate how he’d come to this conclusion. Perhaps later. A summary of the plan would do fine.

Roman and Patton glanced up at the large side frequently, but Anxiety listened with a critical attentiveness that Logan found himself appreciating. At the end, his brow was furrowed, but he didn’t seem fully decided one way or the other.

“This plan will only work in our current time frame,” Logan cautioned. “As you said, the landscape of this place is always shifting, so we need to take advantage of the patterns that we can. I expect getting lost would not end well.”

Anxiety nodded, and then seemed to come to a decision.

“If you’re certain that it’s the best time… Fine, I’ll believe you.” Anxiety grumped, his body language already displaying several signs that he was growing nervous at the idea.

Logan blinked once, genuinely surprised that he had convinced the other Side, before regaining his composure. No time to be touched by Anxiety’s apparent faith in him. “All the data I reviewed points to this being the best opportunity.”

“One condition,” Anxiety said, holding up a finger. “If it seems like the plan has failed and things get dangerous, our backup plan is giving me access so I can rise up.”

Roman raised a sharp eyebrow, his sword once again sheathed at his side. “I seem to distinctly recall you freaking out about that idea?”

Anxiety made a face at him. “Yeah, and I’ll continue to not like it, but if it keeps you losers from getting discorporated, I’ll deal. Do you guys agree or not?”

Logan traded looks with the other two, and then nodded. “It’s a reasonable backup plan.”

“Sure,” Anxiety snorted, and then hesitated for a moment before reaching out and placing his uninjured hand palm up on the table next to them.

Patton plopped himself down immediately, but Roman wasn’t as eager.

“I am _not_ going back in your pocket,” Roman told him, unimpressed. “Lint on my outfit is a no-no, let alone giant lint.”

“Your outfit is already ruined,” Anxiety snapped back, rolling his eyes. The blood on the white outfit somewhat resembled a candy cane.

Logan raised a hand to interject before it could become an argument. “If I may suggest, your hood seems like it would both give us more space and allow for a vantage point to watch your back.”

“I can watch my own back,” Anxiety growled, and then sighed. “Just don’t fall out.”

He was exceedingly careful as he reached behind him to the hood of his jacket, and the three of them had no problem getting in, though they did end up knocking a few limbs against each other in the process.

As Logan expected, it was much easier to grip the folds of the hoodie fabric and looking over the edge of it gave them a vertigo-inducing view.

“Okay,” Anxiety said, sounding as though he was speaking more to himself than them. “Let’s do this. It’s probably going to crash and burn horribly, but whatever.”

“Remind me to speak with you about cognitive distortions later,” Logan mused.

From where he was peeking over Virgil’s shoulder, Patton cheered. “Woohoo, you can do it!”

“With our talents to help, we can’t fail,” Roman added, making some sort of dramatic flourish that Anxiety couldn't even see. “Onwards!”

“What am I, a horse?” Anxiety shot back, and then firmed his shoulders slightly and stepped to his door. “Remember, low in the hoodie so you aren’t seen.”

After receiving a chorus of agreements, he took an audible breath and stepped through the door.

The hoodie bounced slightly against his back with every step, but nothing too jarring. Logan resisted the completely illogical urge to hold his breath as they descended the creaking stairs.

After a long moment, Anxiety’s shoulders lowered slightly. “Nobody’s down here.”

He picked his way carefully through the living area, until they were back where they started, at that huge, weathered front door. It seemed much less insurmountable from Anxiety’s eye level. The other Side grabbed the knob and pushed it open, stepping over the threshold.

They all let out a breath of relief.

From there, Logan’s attention was consumed with providing directions in a low mutter, carefully navigating their way through the shifting, fog-covered landscape. Patton occasionally pointed out a distant landmark he maybe recognized, mostly unhelpfully.

Still, all factors considered, they made it a fair distance before things went wrong.

Anxiety had just taken the first step over a wooden bridge when the hair-raising cackle split the air behind them. At Logan’s side, Roman latched onto his wrist with an iron grip.

Anxiety held still for a moment longer before turning around, his hands tucked into his pockets in a faux gesture of casualness. “Remus. I thought silently stalking people in the dead of night was too subtle for you?”

There was an unpleasant crack of bone that made Logan glad he couldn’t see Remus. “Wouldn’t want to scare the little emo and his little uninvited stowaways off, would I?”

The three of them exchanged panicked looks. He knew?

Anxiety took a step back, hissing in frustration. “Are you the reason they’re like this? Or Dee?”

Another cackle. “The enchantment was all me! Double D would ruin my fun if he knew. But you’re no spoilsport! I can already feel all the _exciting_ new additions to this game you’re thinking up in that squishy grey matter of yours. We can have a little fun together! Whaddya say?”

Anxiety took another step back, his back twitching with the urge to turn and flee. “Remus. C’mon. Think about Thomas.”

The atmosphere suddenly darkened, sending a chill down Logan’s spine.

“Maybe he’s the one who should be thinking about us,” Remus said, the grin in his voice suddenly much more menacing. “I know you’re tired of being_ ignored_, Anxiety. You’re just as sick of our snakey friend’s interference as I am. Without them, there will be space for us!”

“Thomas needs them,” Anxiety urged, his rough voice a sharp contrast to Remus’s singsong encouragement.

“Puh-_lease_, we’re not taking them away forever! The Core Bores are like cockroaches; you just can’t get rid of ‘em, even when you crush their little heads.” A thoughtful pause. “They’re just about cockroach-sized now, too!”

Roman’s grip grew painfully tight.

Anxiety shook his head, jostling them slightly, and then began to slowly back across the bridge. The tension in him seemed to scream that he wanted to turn tail and flee, give into his flight instinct. But he couldn’t turn without putting them directly in Remus’s line of sight.

“Don’t be so antsy! I know you want to be noticed as bad as I do,” Remus advanced with slow, predatory steps.

Anxiety was too far from the other end of the bridge. He’d be caught.

Logan made pointed eye contact with the others, and held his free hand out, palm down.

“What I want doesn’t matter here. It’s too risky! It’s. Not. Happening.” They were stepping faster now, the noise overlapping.

Patton nodded once, placing his own hand on top. They both looked to Roman.

“Aw, that’s what I never got about you, emo. You’re always too scared to jump in and grab the bull by the horns! A little goring can be its own kind of fun, y’know.”

Roman’s expression finally turned certain, and he slammed his own hand down, completing the stack.

All of them felt it when the balance shifted, and there was a heartbeat of stillness before everything erupted.

Anxiety turned on his heel and bolted, seconds before a manic, ear-splitting scream split the air from behind them.

“YOU’RE _LEAVING_ US!”

“Rise up!” Roman screeched, clinging to the hood’s fabric for dear life. “_Rise up!”_

“I don’t know how!” Anxiety yelled back, ducking and weaving through the fog-filled forest that had formed around them. “I’m trying to— it’s not the same as just appearing!”

“You have to stay in one spot and focus,” Patton said, trying hard to keep his voice calm. “You can do this!”

Anxiety came to a standstill, and for a few breathless seconds, they waited.

“It’s… it’s not working!”

“Try and focus on where you want to appear. Let yourself rise, don’t try to control it—“ Logan caught a flicker of movement behind them. “Watch out!”

Anxiety twisted out of the way, a double headed axe thunking into the trunk of a nearby tree. He clenched his fists, closing his eyes tightly, and Logan finally felt the familiar sensation of their part of the mindscape dropping into place around them.

He caught one last glimpse of Remus, body twisted into a throwing gesture and gaze almost shocked, before the scene changed to their living room.

Anxiety staggered, face pale, and the lot of them ended up sprawled over the length of the staircase, ungraceful but undoubtedly home and the right size once more.

A moment spent catching their breath, and then.

“We made it!” Patton yelled, voice cracking in relief as he threw his arms out, laid out on his back.

From the carpeted landing he was still facedown on, Roman grunted an exhausted affirmation.

“It was a close call,” Logan said, pushing himself up and dusting his tie off. “We’ll need to take precautions for the future.”

“Good thing we have Anxiety!” Patton said brightly. “He’s an expert at precautionary measures!”

“As long as he doesn’t _precaution_ Thomas into never going outside again,” Roman muttered, with no real aggression to his tone. He seemed just as glad that Anxiety had gotten them all out of there, if not more.

Anxiety didn’t rise to the bait. Logan turned to thank the other Side properly, and was met with the sight of him curled in over himself, a hunched over ball of hoodie. “... Anxiety?”

With a hoarse cry of pain, the Side yanked something from his side. A comically oversized throwing knife, drenched in a slick coating—

“Oh,” Anxiety said in a small voice, struggling to stem the bloodflow from the stab wound in his torso. “Shit.”

Within seconds, a dark stain began to spread, and Logan immediately lurched forwards, trying to seal the wound, erase it, even just put enough pressure on it to clot the bleeding—

Anxiety inhaled sharply. Nothing about the nature of the wound changed. It wasn’t healing. Logan’s hands were covered in warm-wet-red and _nothing was healing._

Past the ringing in his ears, he could hear the others yelling behind him, trying to accelerate Anxiety’s integration into the conscious mind.

All he could focus on was Anxiety’s face, tight with pain and resignation.

“It’s fine,” he muttered, the hitch in his voice betraying him. “We can’t die. It’s fine. Can you— Can you feel Thomas?”

Logan nodded stitedly. The connection was faint, but growing stronger.

Anxiety nodded once, sharply. “Good. That’s— That’s all that matters.”

Then, like the question had been all that was keeping him awake, he went limp like a puppet with strings cut.


End file.
